I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Randomize
