I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
Randomize
