i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize