I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
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