You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
We need to feng shui this bitch.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize