erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
Randomize
