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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
Randomize
