he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
