He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
