Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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