I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
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