To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
Randomize
