I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
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