I hate your face
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
Randomize
