I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
Randomize