This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
Randomize
