...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
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