i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
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