"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
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