he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Randomize
