i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Randomize
