Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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