I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
there is puke in my bra ... again
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize