If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
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