He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Randomize
