Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
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