Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
