I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Randomize