so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
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