i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize
