I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Randomize
