Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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