Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
The uberlube is also flammable
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
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