So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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