just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
Randomize
