i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
Randomize
