A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
I had to cum in my sink.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
dude. I can hear the air.
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
