Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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