i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
Randomize
