Tonight was fucked up. First my mom called me and told me I had to go to the bar to pick up my dad 'cause he was drunk. Then when I got there my dad was doing a body shot from this lady who happened to be my 1st grade teacher. By far the most awkward car ride home. Idk if I should tell my mom or not.
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
Randomize
