the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Randomize
