My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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