Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
