just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
Randomize
