but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
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