she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
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