Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
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