He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
God, I missed his penis.
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