@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
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