I'd wear matching sweaters with you
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
Those nachos came to me in a dream
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
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