had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
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