He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
Randomize
